reali enjoyed my last day of holidays

it was sweet and felt like nothing could compare up to it

and there was only this one person in your whole life

whom u wana share your life with,

start your life with,

and bask in the sweetness that i never had before.

then i just looked

and looked

and stared

and stared

and slowly savoured his slpin face

so innocent and unarmoured

like a baby waiting to be doted on

then i asked myself, am i the onli one who feels like that?

or is he reali like that haha

had hoped i could enjoy the moment forever

but soon my mind was

yeah this is the one

the one inside of me

this is the one... the only one.....only one....

and then sleepiness consumed me...

if it werent so warm

we'll look exactly like two pieces of puzzle pieced up nicely together

hahaha

i fainted todae

terrible ordeal it was

u all can never imagine the pain and perseverance i took even to walk to the toilet

luckily lyn was there

or ill be in hospital now

luckily its not appendicities

but if it were i wonder if its even more painful

cos i was already passing out from this stomach virus haha

other then all these its back to sch tml haha

wendy*6

amazing , having you inside

reali and most truly

i cant believe i actually buy 4D now
machiam like those aunties sial
but all just for the fun of it
and its not a good thing to get addicted to it
so yeah, i know how to control
cos its unlike shopping where i am able to use,
see and touch whichever my money is spent on
thus i can control addiction to 4D
BUT NOT SHOPPING HAHAHA

its my holidays now
and maybe its my only holiday which i can enjoy
before my attachments of hell starts

i want something great to happen before my holidays ends
what is the great thing i am waiting for? haha actually i dont even have an idea

some of my frens have gone for overseas trips
in fact most of them lahh.... and they veri nice, jio me to go
but i lazy to go sial, paiseh arrrRR, think i put down bout 3 offers ha
and i dun think at this point i wana spend money on all these
cos im getting real broke
and my sis de job no more le lor
stupid citibank moved back all the files
haiz so no more seng nang job le

i want something nice to happen before hols end
but at the same thing i'm not doing anything also...
so how can it happen ??!! haha

maeb all i want is to reali spend time with my family n loved ones

and i think for now
i just wana look forward to getting a few stuff for my room
maeb a drawer for my countless no. of clothes flung around my room
and a smaller drawer for my lingerie collection
and most importantly, OUR SOFA BED!!! hehehe


wendy*6
and everyday i just ask why
why now we seem to have different wants
the countless number of whys,
piercing silently inside
i didnt mention no more
so as not to let you know
also knowing there will and there has been
no answers after all
neither a solution
you were unable to answer me
but even more whys???
if not you? then WHO???
but nevermind ,
cos im starting to accept
that people have differences
and just too bad you're not the one with the same ideology
im sorry
but if you know,
dont tell me you know that i am losing hope
cos i know the ugly truth behind
ands its of a depleting attraction, undefined
and i do regret if i ever do something wrong
becos it was a moment of folly
when i felt lost,
lost about how you reali felt.
and it just so happened he passed by
and lent me a shoulder to cry
to embrace, to give me the warmth i wanted
even if its fake, i dun mind
as long as its given me the strength to move on
And though I know im with him
My heart was with you all along my love
I know I have done wrong
Thus, I seek yours forgiveness
my last words... im sorry sorry sorry...

ok i just got to know something bout gary
and i am reali reali disappointed
i dun trust him anymore
thats it
its sort of reali turned me off knowing bout it
realireali
i dont even know am i goin to be his good fren ... still...
cant believe wad happened
an its reali reali just so yucky....
its proven him as a person and his values
and it seems that he is not a person who has nor uses his emotions to feel ppl
he has no sense of responsibility, no good values
and he doesnt even think before doing things on impulse
i think he doesnt even know wad he reali wants
pls u are 21 already
can u just make up your mind and stop hurting people?!!!


i still haven studied a bit
and i seriously do not know why
the lazy bug in me is too formidable liao
i guess i will just scrape thru common test haha
but hey
not studying or getting a good grade doesnt mean im not serious right
anyway grades cant prove a persons goodness in them

my *** in law was a nurse
but to me
i had a real bad impression of her
she can be recognized for being a good nurse in the hospital
but she was a devil at home
so much so for that white angel blah shit haha
she is just two sides to a person
and when lim shi an asked in the interview if i joined nursing cus of her
not a bit i immediately answered

just now yuan went with my family to botak jones
but not open so we went jalan kayu to eat jerry's corner
not bad haha
the steak ok nia
but the baked potato quite nice
next time must try e buffalo wings
looks damn spicy and delicious la
anyway its their signature dish it seems ha
then we sang birthdae song for my eldest sis
cant believe she is actualli 38 le la oOps
dun ever mention i divulged her age here haha
anyway i just wana sae e cake was nice but it was strawberry cream topping
and i hate strawberry creams
but e choc mousse inside yum yum
and yuan , thks for helping to finish e cake by eating 3 shares haha

i think arRR waHhhh ,
these few months i have been knowing too many peoples secrets
and its not reali too good
foR my brain and heart to take
but reali thanks to u all who trust me siaL
Err duno y i write this haha


wendy*6
loved how you made me feel special using ur own genuine way hehehe

random thoughts...

1) i dont know why im still not preparing for my tests up till this moment
.
.
2) last nights bbQ was short but somehow i felt it was fun n reali enjoyed it
.
.
3) i just realised i actually enjoy talking and lookin at fishes
.
.
4) im having nightmares again , every night, and its the same one recurring over and over
.
.
5) i actually feel lonely but dunno of what!!
.
.
6) i feel that im reali damn unattractive hahaha.... almost unwanted... hehe..
.
.
7) i love max, he is like my dog, and he is like a baby
.
.
8) i'm starting to have mixed feelings about gary.....


wendy*6
im tired.........fading away....